Christmas should be more Commercial

"Christmas in America is an exuberant display of human ingenuity, capitalist productivity, and the enjoyment of life. Yet all of these are castigated as "materialistic"; the real meaning of the holiday, we are told, is assorted Nativity tales and altruist injunctions (e.g., love thy neighbor) that no one takes seriously."
-Leonard Peikoff

still more proof that people are idiots

So, I got this hilarious anonymous comment on my third-to-last post, which unintentionally supports my point, once again, that people can't do logic. The poster states that the statement "Colds cause ear infections" implies that a cold is the only thing that causes ear infections. I HOPE all of you can see that this is not the case. If we replace "Driving" with "Getting your head chopped off" in the poster's example, then, according to the poster, the statement "Getting your head chopped off causes you to die" is false because there are other ways to die. In fact, if A causes B, it does not mean that B is only caused by A. For instance, rain causes things to be wet, that anonymous post caused me to laugh, chicken pox causes itching.

The issue is not whether colds, in fact, cause ear infections. The issue is that the text of the article, which was supposed to show why colds do not cause ear infections, actually said that they do cause ear infections.

The "crap" and the end of my original post is a symbolic derivation of "everyone is an idiot and can't do logic" from the premises given by the article, and I put it there for the benefit of anyone who has taken a logic class in school.

Finally, a couple corrections. I am not a statistician, unless you mean that I know things about statistics and have taken statistics classes and use statistical tools in my job, which I do and have. Secondly, this has nothing to do with correlation vs. causation. Correlation between two events means that the two events occur in a regular relationship to one another. For instance, two events that frequently occur together and rarely occur apart are highly correlated. This has nothing to do with my post. While it is true that ear infections and colds are highly correlated in children, I was obviously not trying to derive a causation relationship from this fact. I was analyzing statements made in the article, not drawing my own conclusions about ear infections from any data. Mistaking correlation for causation means seeing that two things occur together and assuming one causes the other, when they might both independently be caused by unrelated parts of some third event. My post had to do with people not understanding that when an event causes a chain of events that produces some effect, that first event, in fact, causes the final one. As long as each step in the chain has a causal relationship to the next, the first has a causal relationship to the last.

I don't know how to make this any clearer. I am NOT saying anything about the relationship between colds and ear infections. I am saying something about an article.

those crazy muslims, again

"The new law also drops the death penalty for sex outside of marriage."

Wait, what?

1 = 100

Verizon customer service employees, including managers, do not know the difference between .002 dollars and .002 cents. According to one, the difference is "a matter of opinion."

http://uneasysilence.com/archive/2006/12/8721/

more proof that everyone is an idiot and can't do logic

First, we have this article:
http://edition.cnn.com/2006/HEALTH/parenting/12/07/par.sick.myths/index.html


It is listing common myths about kids' health, and the reality of the situation. Most of them are fine, but then you get to the last one:

Colds cause ear infections

The truth: It does seem that way, but all colds are caused by viruses, while 90 percent of ear infections are caused by bacteria. So, why does your child seem to get an ear infection every time he has a cold? "Colds create mucus and fluid buildup in the ear tubes -- a perfect environment for ear infection -- causing bacteria to grow," says Ari Brown, M.D., coauthor of "Toddler 411: Clear Answers and Smart Advice for Your Toddler."

The part labled "the truth" says that colds cause ear infections. The quote from the doctor says colds cause mucus and fluid buildup, causing bacteria to grow. That is, colds cause mucus and fluid, mucus and fluid causes bacteria to grow, and bacteria causes colds.

So this section says:
"myth: A->D. reality: A->B, B->C, C->D"

I will use these two premises to prove that everyone is an idiot and can't do logic.

Let "T" represent "everyone is an idiot and can't do logic"

~(A->D). A->B. B->C. C->D. :. T

1 Show T..............................."show conc"
2 ~T.......................................ass id
3 P^~S .................................pr1 nc
4 P ........................................3 sl
5 Q .......................................4 pr2 mp
6 R .......................................5 pr3 mp
7 S ........................................6 pr4 mp
8 ~S .....................................3 sr
9 ...........................................7 8 id

Line 9 boxes and cancels line 1, meaning we have shown T.

QED.

tech support

The computers at my office always give errors when a web page contains javascript code. One of my projects at work contains a js search engine which is fully functional on my home computer. At work, the errors cause it to not work. Below is my conversation with the guy who came over from the help desk to look at it.

me: There is a problem with the network computers that causes errors in javascript code. See, when I go to foxnews.com, I get a javascript error. When I try to use this javascript search engine that I programmed, I get a javascript error. I don't get these errors on my home computer, only the work computers.

tech guy: well, we can't really debug people's code.

me: it's not a problem with my code. it's probably something with the js engine installed on these machines. the code works just fine at home.

tech guy: well, i can't debug your code. you're not even supposed to be writing code, that's technology's job.

me: no, i don't need you to debug my code. my code is fine. there is some other error that is causing problems with my code as well as all other javascript code on other web pages. *pulls up foxnews.com again to demonstrate*

tech guy: i don't think you understand. it's not our job to debug code. if you want some programming done, you can submit a work order to technology.

me: look. here is the thing i programmed. see the error? now here is foxnews.com. see how it gives the same error? neither of these errors happen on my home computer. the problem is with the computer, not with my code or foxnews.com's code. *points to coworker* he gets these errors on web pages all the time.

coworker: yeah, it happens all the time, like on foxnews.com.

tech guy, clearly annoyed: i don't know what to tell you. we can't debug code.

me: okay, look. let's pretend that i never programmed that search engine, okay? no search engine. the search engine does not exist.

tech guy: okay.

me: and now, i'm going to foxnews.com. (error pops up) oh look! what is this error? why is that happening?

tech guy: *peers at the screen* That's weird. I'll have someone take a look at that error.

me: *smacks forehead*

Human Instincts

Some people believe that humans have no instincts. I find this rather curious, particularly coming from people who also believe in evolution rather than creationism as the origin of human life.

If humans have no instincts, it means one of three things must be true:
1. The species in the human chain of evolution prior to the development of a rational faculty had no instincts.
2. Once the rational faculty developed, all instincts that this group of organisms previously had suddenly vanished.
3. All human instincts have evolved out of the human population.

2 is false for obvious reasons: characteristics of a population can't suddenly disappear all at once. They have to be selected out of the population. 1 is equally silly: instincts are that which allows organisms to survive in the absence of a rational faculty. These pre-reason "humans" would have been dead in five minutes. 3 is the only one that deserves any consideration, but not much. Population characteristics can only disappear from a population if they are selected against. This means that individuals who have certain characteristics either die at a higher rate or produce offspring at a lower rate than those individuals who lack these characteristics. It is impossible that every instinct posessed by pre-reason "humans" has been selected against to such a degree that it has disappeared from the population.

Therefore, humans must have instincts. This seems very very obvious to me, so if anyone knows of some 4th alternative or something that I missed, please tell me.

Obviously.

(22:59:46) Ilyeria: cheese on the other hand, is obviously not feminine

the 9th amendment

I'd like to take a moment to remind all you Constitution fetishists of the 9th amendment. This is for everyone who thinks that the Constitution is the source of rights, and that people have no rights except those described in the constitution. It reads as follows:

"The enumeration in the Constitution, of certain rights, shall not be construed to deny or disparage others retained by the people."

my faith in humanity has taken a serious blow

I'm watching "Who Wants to be a Millionaire" and the question was "which of these grammatical errors can be fixed with the use of a semicolon?" I forget what the wrong answers were, but the VERY VERY OBVIOUS correct answer was "run-on sentence." This was a $2000 question. She had to use a lifeline. I almost cried.

what. the. hell.

This just in: square-shaped buildings are an insult to Islam.

no whining

You know what I'm sick of? People whining about their problems. I don't mean people with legitimate problems that they are trying to work out or find solutions for. I mean people who are moaning and groaing and feeling sorry for themselves for stupid things. You know what? Bad things happen. Get over it. You think you're the only who has been hurt? Nobody understands your pain? Give me a break. Some people have real problems and you are cheapening their situations by acting like yours are equivalent. Some people lose their parents, their spouses, their children to death. Some people get dumped after years of marriage. Some people have real, serious relationships that they invest a lot of time and energy in and then they are sideswiped by an unexpected breakup. Stop acting like your little fight, or your inability to get a date, or your one-night stand gone wrong condemns you to years of misery. I thought I got away from this when I left high school, but I guess some people never grow up. I'm not an impatient person. I understand that sometimes you get sad about things, and I'm willing to lend an ear for those times. But don't act like it's the end of the world and that life will never go on. Don't blow it out of proportion and turn it into some big romantic tragedy. Stop pretending it was more than it was. The more you whine about it, the less I care. And never, EVER try to use your "pain" as an excuse. I will punch you in the face.

herpes

hehe, i love those commercials for herpes medication. "one study found that 70% of people with herpes got it from their partner when they had no signs or symptoms." what i want to know is wtf is wrong with the 30% whose partners OBVIOUSLY had herpes.

Throwing in the towel

Well he looks at me with those Innocent eyes,
And says it looks like you're wearing some kind of disguise,
Because your hair sticks up, your shoes are untied,
I hope that you got that shirt on half price,
And every word I say falls flat on the floor,
I try to tell a joke, he's heard it before,
And I don't think that I can take it no more,
He's driving me right out of my front door,

And I try so hard just to figure him out,
But he won't tell me what he's thinking about,
And then he falls asleep on the living room couch,
With his sunglasses on and his tongue hanging out,
And then he disappears for a week at a time,
And then he shows up just like everything's fine,
And I don't get what goes on in his mind,
But I'm tired of hearing the same stupid lines,

But can't you just pretend to be nice,
Can you at least pretend to be nice,
If you could just pretend to be nice,
Then everything in my life would be alright

-Josie and the Pussycats

more quote goodness

guy on furniture-building show: and finally, hard-working poplar for ultimate paintability!

gary: i'm just too fast for you, sara. in and out, that's my game.

i <3 Kenneth

Kenneth: "my teeth are whiter than your mom"

An open letter to clothing retailers

Dear sellers of clothing,

Please stop displaying your clothes on mannequins that are too small for them, pinning 4 inches of excess cloth behind their backs to make it look like the clothes fit. If your smallest size is too small for the mannequin, get bigger mannequins or make smaller clothes. Stop tricking me into thinking you carry my size.

Thank you in advance for your cooperation,

Sara

reality is stranger than fiction

actual church sign

I'm not making these up

seriously


p.s. if the links don't work just copy and paste them directly into the browser and you can see the pictures.

a long hiatus broken...

(10:40:07) Kishikaisei13: hey, straight guys are allowed to appreciate the chiseled features of other guys

i love emina

(21:36:04) alluringLeggs: how do they kill animals humanely, by giving them pain killers??
(21:36:25) tallbladeofgrass: slitting their throats with a special knife and draining all their blood
(21:36:35) alluringLeggs: thats what we did in romania
(21:36:40) alluringLeggs: but we didnt call it kosher
(21:36:46) alluringLeggs: we called it, go kill a chicken and cook it

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

unconformity

The following is a conversation I had with someone about decorating my apartment:

him: have you decided on a decorating theme?
me: asian
him: *rolls eyes*
me: huh?
him: how creative of you
me: what?
him: nothing...

Now, I can't be certain of the nature of his thoughts during this conversation since he wouldn't tell me, but I can make some educated guesses. If this is not what he was thinking, then use my interpretation isntead as an example of how some people really do think, and apply the following rant to those people instead.

As you may know, all things East Asian have been gaining popularity of late. From sushi to anime to Memoirs of a Geisha to shoji screens, items of East Asian origin can be found in many US stores today. To put it briefly, Asia is "in." As such, my desire to decorate my apartment in such a way is "uncreative" and, therefore, bad.

Where do I begin?

First, let me say how very annoying are those people who complain when they like something "first" which later becomes popular. For instance, the popularity of styles previously confined to Hot Topic among the general populus. People who bought their wardrobes exclusively from Hot Topic, say, 6 years ago, are now angry that these "posers" are infringing on their "uniqueness" and that now such "unoriginal" stores as Macy's carry plaid, chain-laden pants and leather dresses. Let me play a very tiny violin for your sad, sad plight. If these people would grow up for a moment, they would realize that such an increase in popularity can only mean good things for these trailblazers of cool. It means more products are available in more places at less cost.

I first discovered Sailor Moon in 6th grade or so. At the time, it had been removed from US tv, presumably due to lack of viewers. To my joy, it came back when I was in 9th grade, and I watched it dutifully every day after school in terrible, terrible, english dub. I loved it. And when Japanese-language DVDs with subtitles were released a few years later, I bought them all. There was a little independent video store on De Anza Blvd that carried them, and it was the only place I could find it. Today, I can buy zillions of anime DVDs on Amazon.com. I can rent them from Netflix. I can find anime products all over the place. Let me tell you, I could not be more excited. Anyone who feels differently in this sort of situation is retarded.

No less annoying is the sentiment expressed by my friend that choosing a decorative theme that many other people like is somehow "uncreative." Unique is not the same thing as creative, and neither are criteria upon which the quality of interior design should be judged. Things are not better just because they are different. And anyone who suggests that one ought not to like the same things as everyone else is completely irrational and worse than people who suggest the opposite. If one likes a certain vase, or skirt, or song, or decorating style, one ought to do so whether five million other people also like it or whether zero do.

I happen to like very much Asian-style things. If I had to choose a sentiment other than apathy at the number of other people who like this style, it could only be positive, because these numbers have only served to increase the number of things I can buy for my apartment (both because of lower prices and sheer variety).

And to anyone who would roll his eyes and say to me "how creative of you," I say:

You are incorrect; good day.

what's in a name?

http://www.cnn.com/2006/US/08/09/egyptian.students/index.html

The three captured students:

• Mohamed Ragab Mohamed Abd Alla

• Ebrahim Mabrouk Moustafa Abdou

• Eslam Ibrahim Mohamed El-Dessouki

The remaining eight students were identified as:

• El Sayed Ahmed Elsayed Ibrahim, 20

• Alaa Abd El Fattah Ali El Bahnasawi, 20

• Ahmed Refaat Saad El Moghazi El Laket, 19

• Ahmed Mohamed Mohamed Abou El Ela, 21

• Mohamed Ibrahim Elsayed El Moghazy, 20

• Moustafa Wagdy Moustafa El Gafary, 18

• Mohamed Saleh Ahmed Maray, 20

• Mohamed Ibrahim Fouaad El Shenawy, 17

I am extremely amused.

Where do I begin?

Among the more stupid articles I've read in my life. First of all, the presence of doctors at lethan injections should have absolutely nothing to do with whether the process is "humane." The same chemicals get injected in the same exact ways no matter who happens to be watching. They could have a doctor program a robot to do the job and it would be the same. Secondly, what the hell does this mean:

"The problem is that few doctors are willing to do it. Ultimately, this could put a halt to the use of lethal injections."

Just how many people are we executing these days? We could have one doctor willing to do the job and that would be enough.

And finally, wtf? How is lethan injection cruel or unusual? Dead is dead.

you know what i really hate? those bumper stickers that say "why do we kill people who kill people to show that killing is wrong?"

That question has a very simple answer: we don't. This is for two reasons.

1. We don't "kill people who kill people." We kill only some of the people who kill people. We certainly don't have our soldiers executed. And we don't execute executioners. Or people who take their family members off life support.

2. "killing" is not wrong. murder is wrong. self-defense is not.

as cute as this bumper sticker is trying to be, i will deprive it of its use of synonyms, at which point you will see just how retarded it is:

"why do we execute people who murder people to show that murder is wrong?"

quit context-dropping, assholes.

ahhhh i've been wanting one of these for years!!!

how true

Ilyeria: after you go cyber with everyone
tallbladeofgrass: oh yes, you know me
tallbladeofgrass: "oh baby, take my pants off. yeah, that's good. oh wait, you are in another city on a computer and can't take my pants off over the internet. right."

LOL

I submit that if people had any idea what should really qualify as art, this never would have happened. YOU SHOULD NOT BE ABLE TO CONFUSE THINGS THAT ARE NOT ART WITH REAL ART. THAT MEANS THE STUFF YOU ARE CALLING REAL ART IS BAD.

"I've heard of you mormons! You and your magic underpants!"

well, it's good to know that my friends and i were right about "dialogue" being a retarded fluff word that doesn't actually mean anything.

observe:
"Dialogue is not discussion...Nor is it debate. These forms of conversation contain an implicit tendency to point toward a goal, to hammer out an agreement, to try to solve a problem"


they said it, not me.

i've been reading story after story on this website, but this story is by far the best

x-men 3 was a terrible movie. i don't even know where to begin describing how bad it was. it was a philosophical travesty, but that was to be expected, given the first two movies. philosophy aside, it was still horrible.

absolutely nothing about the movie is convincing. love triangles spring up out of nowhere and go nowhere. the most powerful character in the movie spends all but 5 minutes of it just standing around and not talking. major characters are killed off left and right, but the movie is so bad that you don't even care. character development is nonexistent, and new mutants just appear in the story as if they have been there all along. there is a fantastically cheesy "fight" between the ice boy and the fire boy: they shoot streams of fire and ice at each other, and the streams meet in the middle and push back and forth.

the plot sucks. nobody had any convincing motivation for their actions. the twists and tangents that the plot could have taken never lasted more than 30 seconds. wolverine gets summoned to jean's side by her voice in his head, but when he gets there she just stands around and doesn't interact with him at all. storm boldly assumes the role of headmistress of the mutant school and then...does nothing. jean and wolverine have a disturbing make-out session that leads to...nothing. ice boy and the girl who can walk through walls bond during an evening of skating and then...nothing. jean joins with magneto for reasons that are never explained and then does nothing, and then nearly blows up the world at the end for no reason. if i had to guess how this movie was written, i would guess that the writers came up with various events that they wanted to take place in the movie and then, instead of writing a coherent storyline into which these events would fit, they just wrote each event and spliced them all together.

there were also a number of instances of people using their power in stupid/ridiculous ways. wolverine keeps trying to go after magneto even though HIS BODY IS FILLED WITH METAL. magneto, instead of putting his underlings into some cars and moving those over to the island, drops one end of the golden gate bridge on the island so they can walk. which is obviously much more practical. then, surrounded by metal that he could easily throw at his opponents, he sends in ALL of his underlings, who are promptly incapacitated or killed. instead of crushing the lab, blowing it up, using phoenix to disintegrate it, etc, he sends minions INTO the building to RETRIEVE the boy and kill him. two of his minions, instead of just killing the head lab guy, take him up to the roof and throw him off, where his winged son can easily catch him. the girl who walks through walls, instead of putting the juggernaut inside a wall or something to suffocate him, just traps his lower body in the floor.

also, let me just say, rogue has the most retarded accent i have ever heard.

oh yeah, and when magneto is on the bridge, it is daytime when he drops the end of it onto the island. in the next scene it is suddenly night, and nothing has happened in between.

anyway, don't see this movie.

jesus pan

This is a pic from some random person's myspace. It's a perfect example of the "myspace angles" phenomenon. The best part is the mouse in the bottom left corner. Additionally, she looks disturbingly like Michael Rosenbaum:

You know those commercials for at-home pregnancy tests where the female voice-over says "I can't concentrate. Could I be pregnant?"?

A much better commercial would be: "The condom broke. Could I be pregnant?"

HOLY MOTHER OF GOD

two philosophers and a farmer figure out what i figured out in like 3rd grade

i'm really going to cry if this is actually a new discovery

LOL

quite possibly the saddest thing i've read in a long time.

"It turns out those "healthy" foods were just as fattening as the chips and soda they replaced: The yogurt was filled with Reese's Pieces and the low-fat cookies were brimming with sugar that kept her hunger on razor's edge."

what? you mean just because it's called "yogurt" doesn't mean it's healthy yogurt??? astounding!

"Many brands of granola, for example, can be packed with up to 600 calories per cup and are loaded with more sugar than a cup of Cap'n Crunch."

duh.

"Just because the basic thing is healthy doesn't mean it's a healthy dish,"

duh.

But even foods labeled organic or "natural" can have just as many calories.

DUHHHHHHHHHHHH.

"Rather than using all the marketing claims, the best thing to do is turn the product over and look at the nutritional facts to check the caloric content -- and pay attention to the serving size,"

dum dum dum DUH

are we still not afraid of iran, hippies?

These men are GODS AMONG MEN!

why can't anyone just be consistently correct about anything? this article
was in the daily bruin today. it's all fine and well, explaining why men should have no obligations to a child they unwillingly fathered. namely, since men have no choice in whether the fetus is carried to term, they cannot be given obligations to it just because someone else decides it will be born.

anyway, it's all good and well and suddenly she throws this in:

Whether or not men have a right to opt out of fatherhood, single-parent households need to be supplied with enough state support so that they can survive. They need to be provided with services such as free child care, and perhaps some support from the state to cover the child's basic needs. This support shouldn't be enough to make it beneficial for the man to opt out of fatherhood, but enough so that a woman wouldn't have to worry about survival if he chose to opt out and she chose to have the child.

what the hell is this? it has nothing to do with the article and is just some random leftist tangent. and it's wrong. women should have to "worry about" the consequences of their choices. and the state has no business giving support to anyone.

lol

"There are too many predators out there that could endanger their kids' lives or could sexualize them too early by sending unwanted messages and pictures and things like that and leet-speak is just a gateway to all of that."

Cmndr James Bond: on this test I took today, I drew a picutre of a plane crashing and a guy parachuting out of it for one of my questions, cause I had no clue what the answer was

the button I will put on myspace to link to my blog. Ironically, I have to host it on my blog.

I distain the practice of calling lower-class people "working-class." "Middle-class" and "upper-class" are appropriate terms if you want to divide people up by income or whatever. "Working-class" is not. Did middle and upper class people get to the middle or upper class without working? I think not. Are there plenty of people in the lower class that do not work (ahem, welfare)? Signs point to yes. In the world of words that have precise meanings, every working person is a member of the working class--strawberry pickers, nannies, teachers, C.E.O.s, anyone. Implying that those whose working brings in more money are not of the working class is insulting.

Mexico figures out how to lower its crime rate. Expect to see mass immigration from US to Mexico, more college parties in Tijuana.

I received this bulletin on myspace today:

On May 15th all myspace members are to not go to the gas station in protest high gas prices. Gas is now over $3.00 a gallon in most places. There are 72,110,073 members currently on the network, and the average car takes about 20 to 30 dollars to fill up. If all myspace members did not go to the pump on the 15th it would take $2,163,302,190.00 out of the oil companys pockets for just one day, so please do not go to the gas station on May 15th and lets try to put a dent in the oil industry for at least one day.

If you agree repost this bulletin...


I don't even have any words to respond to it. I can only make exasperated sounds, such as "GAH" and "GRAHHHG."

The idiocy of the general populace never ceases to amaze me. Let's discuss this bulletin, shall we?

First of all, May 15th is a Monday. Everyone who typically drives on Mondays (say, to work) will still have to drive on Monday. If they have no gas, they will still have to buy it. Let's say that all of these people buy their gas on the 14th to prepare for the no-gas day, or hold out until Tuesday. a) this will just redistribute the earnings to Sunday and Tuesday. b) no company cares about daily earnings. Financial statements are produced yearly, quarterly, monthly. Not daily. The total earnings reported at these intervals would not change. Plenty of businesses operate at a loss on some days, but it is to their benefit in the long run to do so. This retarded boycott will do NOTHING.
Furthermore, I would bet a large sum of money that 90% of myspace's population is too young to drive. We may as well distribute this bulletin at our local middle schools.

All of this, however, is beside the point. The point is that people need to quit whining and take a remedial economics course. I'll even direct you to one.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Supply_and_demand

Oil companies are not "mean" or "evil." They are not "gouging." Prices of gas are determined by the market demand for and supply of gas. These two curves are affected by expectations, the market for crude oil, refining capacity, and numerous other factors. If oil companies were to charge below market price, there would be shortages (see the oil crises of the 1970s).

All this nonsense about "record profits" is retarded. Exxonmobil has a 10% profit margin. That means for every dollar they earn in revenue, 10 cents is net income. There are plenty of people running around as ignorant of business operations as they are of finance, and seem to think that money just APPEARS in the pockets of business owners and that it doens't cost anything to run a business. This may come as a shock to the hippies out there, but nobody goes into business to break even. For a list of the profit margins for other companies, please look here.

Equally disgusting is the call for oil companies to "justify" their high profits. What does that even mean? "I DEMAND that these people justify their ability to run a business well!" "How DARE they have so many customers that are willing to buy their product at the market price??" I am so disgusted I can hardly express it in words. A company invests resources (this is a risky procedure) to develop and sell a product, and people want more and more of it and use so much of it that they "can't live without it" and then take its producers to the guillotine. Why don't we just bring back Stalin and start forcing random people to refine and sell oil? After all, comrade, anyone who selfishly pursues a career of his own choosing in the face of the needs of the people is obviously unpatriotic.

gary: i was trying to confuse you into pantsmission
sara: pants...mission?
gary: yeah, it's like submission, only with pants!




gary: i've never tried to sperm on anyone's face

not sure if i already posted this comic here...

can't hurt to have it twice!

Since the western world is in the business of appeasing muslim terrorists instead of catching them, why not go the distance and appease the ones who have been caught?

me, re: the bible.

tallbladeofgrass: IT'S A FAIRY TALE
tallbladeofgrass: IT'S THE CHIRSTIAN ILLIAD
tallbladeofgrass: GET OVER IT

Cmndr James Bond: I think she should be committed
tallbladeofgrass: well obviously, but so should all religious people

ah, easter. time to bring out the peeps

I wish I wrote for the Onion, because I have a great idea for a piece of satire. The headline would be "Liberals push for organ redistribution program." It would have such delicious invented quotes as:

"Wealth redistribution programs have come a long way over the past decade, but they are not enough. Of course it is unfair that some people have money while others don't, but what is even more unfair is that some have healthy organs while others don't. People die on transplant lists every day, waiting for an organ that never comes. We must do whatever we can to rectify this injustice."

"Why should people lucky enough to have two working kidneys get to enjoy life while others are hooked up to dialysis machines? People who insist on keeping more kidneys than they need are just being greedy."

"Sitting by and watching someone die of lung failure, while just a fraction of one of your lungs could save them, is tantamount to murder. You just don't have the right to refuse your excess organs to people who need them."

*will post more as i think of them*

Just in case you had any doubts about scientologists being insane.

The Southpark clip

In case you thought Southpark was joking.

Top 10 Junk Science Stories

"If you want to play it safe and avoid substances in food that cause cancer in lab animals, try not to eat or drink."

proof that real life is even better than the onion

PSA: when your "art" is mistaken for trash and thrown away, it's probably trash.

hehe, and this one:
" Forcasters are predicting eighteen billion hurricanes by August or something"

hehe, my new favorite fark headline: "The number of 11-year-old shark-bite victims this year is up infinity percent. EVERYBODY PANIC"

in case you were thinking of going to law school, think again

U.N. writes a letter threatening to write more letters if Iran does not stop its nuke program. I'm amazed Iran has not yet crumbled under the pressure.

just in case you weren't convinced that muslims are crazy

i heart natalie portman

looks like the muslims aren't the only crazy religious people

i just made a delicious discovery. on the myspace profile of a ridiculously religious person i know, the results of an iq test are posted. while this person scored "genius" on math and verbal intelligence and "exceptional" on general knowledge, the score for logical intelligence was "below average." surprised? me neither.

there are few songs i loathe more than "what if god was one of us." it lures you in with its catchy tune, only to assault you with religious nonsense. if this weren't bad enough, it has to do it in grammatically incorrect fashion. it ought to be "what if god were one of us." this question calls for the subjunctive tense, which the artist (if you can call her that) carelessly disregards, unaware of the outrageous error she has made. the only thing good to come out of this song is the parody, "What if god smoked cannabis?" Note the lack of grammatical errors.

just one more reason to drink coke

pepsi demonstrates its idiocy (and its low opinion of consumer intelligence), filing suit because showing an amish horse-cart with 10 bales of hay outrunning one with 50 bales of hay obviously means powerade makes you fast.

"In other words, Coca-Cola is telling consumers that Powerade Option's fewer calories literally make you go faster."

yeah, anyone stupid enough to think that deserves to be shot in the head.

next thing you know, someone will be suing red bull saying "In other words, Red Bull is telling consumers that Red Bull energy drinks literally give you wings."

in case anyone was wondering, i plan to name my first son tristan and my first daughter london. just fyi

Somehow, I can't help but think that these two articles are related.

someone finally figures out the proper way to protect the environment

only in america do people not only sue other people for their own mistakes, but they sue themselves!


hehe, all that barn-raising comes in handy.

"The Lord was in (the tornado)."

another brilliant googlefight, thanks to Kathleen

150 most popular children's books of all time.

I have read at least 99 of them.

take that, creationists.

silly nonsense

This article says that soda is a major cause of obesity, and if it gets proven then politicians will be able to tax soda like they tax cigarettes. I think this is a fabulous idea, but it doesn't go far enough. You know what else is a major cause of obesity? Food. Why stop at soda? Why not tax all food? And the more food you eat, the more taxes you have to pay, like income. Thanks for the great idea, soda-hater guys! *end sarcasm*

Today, from the world of useless statistics:

"One-third said they were failing in school, but more than six out of 10 were maintaining C averages or better when they quit. "

For the less-than-quick, 1/3 = 3.33/10. 10-3.33 = 6.67. 6.67/10 = 2/3 > 6/10.

read: "one third said they were failing in school, but two-thirds were not."

As opposed to some third alternative.

Thank you, Reuters.

i've decided to compile a list of all the anime i've seen. why? because i am cool.

completed:
sailor moon
love hina
shaman king
witch hunter robin
fruits basket
ah! my goddess
read or die
serial experiments lain
ai yori aoshi
chobits
evangelion
magic knight rayearth
x-tv
onegai sensei
onegai twins
ghost in the shell
azumanga daioh
spiral
elfen lied
escaflowne
dn angel
someday's dreamers
chrono crusade (REALLy awful, don't watch it)
stellvia

partially completed:
naruto
FLCL
rurouni kenshin
outlaw star
wedding peach


only a few eps:
slayers
read or die tv
happy lesson

movies:
naussica and the valley of wind
my neighbor totoro
princess mononoke
grave of the fireflies
spirited away
howl's moving castle
...hehe, notice how all the movies are miyazaki films ^.^...

hehe, chad showed me www.googlefight.com.

some of my results:

reason: 899,000,000
faith: 402,000,000

life:
death: 3,620,000,000

anime: 164,000,000
not anime: 25,100,000

selfishness: 7,110,000
altruism: 6,760,000

capitalism: 49,100,000
communism: 32,000,000
socialism: 27,000,000

free trade: 516,000,000
tariffs: 28,400,000

freedom: 432,000,000
islam: 153,000,000

denmark: 549,000,000
islam: 153,000,000

Lately, I feel like my life is like that Offspring song. I forget what it's called, but it's about all the kids that grew up and became drug addicts and the like. Only instead of becoming drug addicts, all the kids I grew up with have become leftists, feminazis, and fundies. If Offspring had written a song about intellectual bankruptcy instead of drug use, my old friends would have been in it.

I cry for my childhood.

Here are all the majors at UCLA with the word "studies" in them:

Afro-American Studies
American Indian Studies
Asian American Studies
Chicano and Chicana Studies
Communication Studies
East Asian Studies
European Studies
Geography/Environmental Studies
Global Studies
Iranian Studies
Jewish Studies
Latin American Studies
Religion, Study of
Russian Studies
Southeast Asian Studies
Women's Studies


See any legitimate majors? Me neither.

*updated 2/22*
Some of these are more legitimate than others and some are good programs to take to supplement other majors, sort of like a specialization. For instance, some would go well with a major in a language, and others would go well with history (<3 Kristin). The worst by far is "Geography/Environmental Studies" which might as well be called "hippiness 101". The "Global Studies" major looks like it could be hippyish, but could supplement some kind of business major. I leave it to you to browse the descriptions of the majors and decide which ones are really worthwhile. There are also some majors that ought to be "studies" majors but are not. I didn't list those. I also could have sworn there was an LGBT major, but I didn't see one.

http://www.admissions.ucla.edu/prospect/Majors/lsmajor.htm

haha, europe sucks

what is this trend of people on myspace having obnoxious backgrounds that make it impossible to read the text on the page?

uh oh, the mormons let it slip that religion is a big fat lie.

"This may look like the crushing blow to Mormonism from the outside," said Jan Shipps, a professor emeritus of religious studies at Indiana University-Purdue University Indianapolis, who has studied the church for 40 years. "But religion ultimately does not rest on scientific evidence, but on mystical experiences. There are different ways of looking at truth." (emphasis mine)

governor of maine perpetuates the belief that if you want something to be true, it will become true.

sweet zombie jesus

the best part is where he pulls a house out of his pants

this link needs no introduction

http://www.hotornotchurchsites.com/

a quick word of advice to all my straight male friends on valentine's day

boys, if you are ever considering buying jewelry for a girl, there are some very important things you need to remember.

color is key. plenty of girls absolutely hate yellow gold. i imagine some also hate white gold and silver. FIND OUT BEFORE YOU BUY HER SOMETHING. getting it wrong is a big no-no. a good woman, of course, won't mind that you don't know her jewelry style, but giving a bad gift is like giving her a gift card--something that didn't take a whole lot of thought on your part, but will let her get something nice that she wants. it just isn't the same.

take a hint from jewelry she already owns. don't get something of a completely different style, unless you can be sure she will like it. some girls like huge chunky things, others small and delicate things. they don't mix well.

enlist the help of another woman. the best option is a good friend of your girl who hopefully knows her tastes better than you do, but most girls can help steer you in the right direction if you can give them a few hints. they can at least steer you away from anything truly heinous. if you don't know any other women, find a guy who has good taste in jewelry. the people working at the jewelry store can help you too, but only as a last resort.

hehe, what the hell?

"He knew that Jack would shrive the ultram for the supply-and-demand soon enough."

hehe, i love Rand.

In the preface to The Ayn Rand Lexicon:

"People will be able to look up BREAKFAST and see that I did not advocate eating babies for breakfast."

valentine's day linkies

uno

dos

I remain unconvinced that lying as such constitutes force. Certainly, the ability to lie does not render contracts meaningless, as some have suggested. After all, a contract represents a transfer of rights (as does a promise). It doesn't matter if you were lying when you made the contract, because you already transfered the rights. Additionally, if lying did render a contract invalid, it would do so regardless of whether the lying itself was considered force or not. This means that the claim "I was lying when I made that contract" would be a valid defense to avoid retribution for a breach of contract in either case. A person who broke a contract or promise would be punished for lying, but would not be held accountable for the contract breach. (he could only be held accountable for the breach if, in fact, rights had been transfered, which could only be true if the contract remains valid despite the lie). It seems to me that any contract made voluntarily (lie or no lie) ought to be valid, lest the liar be free from the responsibility of keeping it. In that case, not every statement needs to be considered a contract in order for promises and written contracts to work.

I am not convinced that every statement constitutes a transfer of rights, just as not every action constitutes a transfer of rights. No claim that I make compels you to act as thought it is true: that is a choice you have. In fact, you have the choice to act as though it is true even if you don't hear it from me. My statement does not give you any more (or any fewer) options than you already had. For instance, say you are planning a trip to the park tomorrow. You can either bring an umbrella or not, depending on whether you choose to assume it will rain or not. Suppose I tell you that it will not rain tomorrow. You still can either bring a umbrella or not, depending on whether you choose to assume it will rain or not. My statement does not alter your options, prevent you from acting on your own independent judgment, or force you to choose either way. As an analogy to the realm of non-speech action, if I hand you a pen, it does not mean the pen now belongs to you. I do not need to specify that I am not transfering the rights to the pen. Why should information be any different?

I do not see this posing any problems in court cases. If a written contract has been breached, a transfer of rights has obviously been made and the breach constitutes theft. If the defendant tries to say, "Well, I was lying when I signed the contract so I didn't actually transfer any rights," he would still be punished because the contract did transfer rights, whether or not he lied. Similarly, in the case of a verbal promise to provide goods or services (which can be proven), an obvious transfer of rights has occurred. In cases which or not so obvious, it is the province of the courts to determine whether rights have been transfered.

As I understand it, according to objectivism, fraud is not force because it involves lying--it is force because it involves theft. The fact that the non-fulfillment of a promise renders the promise false is not what makes it wrong. What makes it wrong is that the rights to the promised good or service have been transfered to the person to whom the promise was made, so, by failing to provide the good or service, the person who made the promise is keeping the other person's property by force.

Also, contrary to what some people seem to think, the nonfulfillment of contract terms does not retroactively make the promise a lie. Something can only be a lie if it is contrary to the knowledge of the person making it. That is, only epistemological falsities constitute lies. Statements that are epistimologically true but turn out to be metaphysically false are not lies. If, at the time of the promise, the person making it fully intends to fulfill it based on the context of his knowledge at a time, then it is true. The fact that later circumstances result in non-fulfillment does not change the content of his knowledge at the time he made the promise, so it cannot cause his promise to be a lie. Promises can only be lies if the promiser knows he will not fulfill them.

Consider the implications of a world where the first case is true (where any statement becomes a lie if it turns out to be metaphysically false) and where lying constitutes force. Any promise, explicit contract, or statement which is not fulfilled or "becomes" false would be considered a lie. This means that no one would be responsible for any broken contracts ever, because they would all be lies and no rights would have been transfered.

wow

wow, california high school students are really dumb.

From The Ayn Rand Lexicon:

Concepts. A concept is a mental integration of two or more units which are isolated by a process of abstraction and united by a specific definition. Conceptualization is a method of expanding man's consciousness by reducing the number of its content's units.

Anti-Concepts. An anti-concept is an uneccessary and rationally unusable term designed to replace and obliterate some legitimate concept...a term which sounds like a concept, but stands for a "package-deal" of disparate, incongruous, contradictory elements taken out of any logical conceptual order or context...Let me remind you that the purpose of a definition is to distinguish the things subsumed under a single concept from all other things in existence; and, therefore, their defining characteristic must always be that essential characteristic which distinguishes them from everything else.

Analytic-Synthetic Dichotomy. The assault on man's conceptual faculty has been accelerating since Kant, widening the breach between man's mind and reality. The cognitive function of concepts was undercut by a series of grotesque devices--such, for instance, as the analytic-synthetic dichotomy which, by a route of torturous circumlocutions and equivocations, leads to the dogma that a "necessarily" true proposition cannot be factual, and a factual proposition cannot be "necessarily" true...An analytic proposition is defined as one which can be validated merely by an analysis of the meaning of its constituent concepts.

Fraud. A unilateral breach of contract involves an indirect use of physical force: it consists, in essence, of one man receiving the material values, goods or services of another, then refusing to pay for them and thus keeping them by force (by mere physical posession), not by right--i.e., keeping them without consent of their owner. Fraud involves a similarly indirect use of force: it consists of obtaining material values without their owner's consent, under false pretenses or false promises.

Physical Force. Man's rights can only be violated by the use of physical force. It is only by means of physical force that one man can deprive another of his life, or enslave him, or rob him, or prevent him from pursuing his own goals, or compel him to act against his own rational judgment...Force invalidates and paralyzes a man's judgment, demanding that he act against it, thus rendering him morally impotent.

pirates are real!

very awesome

the L.O.G.I.C. Sims!

people make me angry

"Two values are in conflict here. One is respect for religion and the other is freedom of speech," Editor-in-Chief Peter Vandermeersch told Reuters.

Contradictions do not exist. Values cannot conflict. In particular, respect for religion is not a value. Contradiction solved!

stolen from witt's profile

e^x and a constant are walking down the street together when the constant sees a differential operator coming their way. He starts to run away, and e^x asks "Why are you running away?" The constant answers "That's a differential operator. If it acts on me, I disappear." e^x says "I'm e^x, I don't have anything to worry about." and keeps on walking. When he reaches the differential operator, he says "Hi, I'm e^x."

The differential operator responds, "Hi, I'm d/dy"

obvious

oh my god....

I'd just like to point out to everyone that the word "tolerate" means "to put up with." People tolerate things that are bad, not things that are good. Thus, the concept "tolerance" implies that the cultures that are being "tolerated" are inferior in some way. Someone ought to inform the Museum of Tolerance.

Talking about some articles I have to read for a class:

(19:04:20) tallbladeofgrass: and how people transmigrate to the centers of capitalism because capitalism destroys their home countries or something
(19:04:37) MightyBobX: hehe
(19:04:40) tallbladeofgrass: which makes perfect sense, obviously
(19:04:44) MightyBobX: they cling to that which they fear most!
(19:04:48) tallbladeofgrass: hehe
(19:05:30) MightyBobX: no no, it's because that way they can take it down from the inside. you see, they move to cities, get jobs, learn skills, educate themselves and t heir families, and then... then... i can't remember... do they take down the evil system... or do they live rich, happy lives?

Arthur: I'm good at fitting things into tight places.